"Well Conckers - so far today there are only two stories that I have found of importance"
"Go on then Jason report away..."
"Well in this morning's metro (on page 15) it states that the Sri Lankan Government has had to beg for humanitarian aid..."
"Why's this Jason?"
"Well as it turns out it seems the planned mass genocide of a whole race went badly wrong for the govt. Luckily over 100,000 Tamil civilians managed to escape to aid camps in recent days, but doctors are now struggling to provide help for the injured refugees. Most casualties have sustained blast injuries, with lower limbs "severely injured and blown off"
"I bet my cousins havent been so lucky - noone will be going out of their way to rescue them!!"
"I doubt it Big Paws - I doubt it very much"
"What else has happened then?"
"Well part of the British Army is made of soldiers called the Ghurkas - apparently over 4000 were led to believe that they would have been treated with respect and honoured along with our other soldiers (even though they're not even treated that well themselves) and would be granted permission to live in the Uk after all , thats who theyve supported for many years..."
"So what happened to them then?"
"Well the govt decided to invent special criteria which the soldiers had to pass to be granted permission.."
"Ok - that's fair enough.."
"Is it Conckers?"
"Why - what were the criteria ?"
"The criteria specify that a ghurka must serve for at least 20 years before they are granted residency - The only problem with this is that ghurkas are only allowed to serve the British Govt for 15 years.."
"So the govts not only inventing this again but they're also making it perfectly clear that they would make it a farce as well?!"
"Yup fraid so Big Paws - fraid so"
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